A Brief Explanation of the Sacrament of Marriage

The Orthodox sacrament of marriage is unique in many ways, but primarily in that the ceremony has remained almost entirely unchanged since its origination centuries ago. Another notable aspect of the Orthodox marriage is that the bride and groom do not exchange vows; instead it is their presence before Christ through the priest and the congregation that signifies their wish to be joined and to accept the Lord into their new home. Finally, in the Orthodox tradition, the wedding ceremony is actually two services in one. The first, which is the briefer of the two, is the Service of Betrothal, during which the rings are exchanged. The second, the Service of Crowning, is longer and includes many prayers offered for the couple, the crowning of the bride and groom in marriage, sharing of the common cup and the celebratory procession around the table.

The Service of Betrothal

During this first service, the priest offers petitions on behalf of the bride and groom. He then asks God's blessings upon the rings and proceeds to bless the bride and groom with the rings. Performed three times in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, the priest will start first from the groom to the bride, and then from the bride to the groom. The weaving motion between bride and groom represents their lives being entwined into one; the weaknesses of each are filled by the strengths of the other. The priest then places the wedding rings on the ring fingers of the right hands of both the bride and groom.  The right hand holds special connotations in the Orthodox faith, which is why it is used during the wedding ceremony. From ancient times the right hand was the hand of authority.   Then the sponsor (the koumbaro or koumbara) exchanges the rings on the bride and groom three times further emphasizing the union of their lives. The service closes with a final prayer, which seals the placement of rings and emphasizes that the marriage was enacted by God Himself. In the Biblical references found in the prayer, the ring is a sign of God’s pledge to man. Therefore the ring also represents the commitment that the couple is making to God.

The Service of Crowning

The Candles

The priest will present the Wedding Candles to both partners, and instruct them to hold them in their left hands. The candle flame symbolizes divine light that has come into the world through Christ. It is a physical manifestation of the spiritual willingness of the couple to receive Christ, Who will bless them through this Mystery. Moreover, as the couple receive the candles, thereby celebrating the light of Christ that has come into the world to illumine their lives as individuals, as well as the mutual joining together of their lives as a couple in Christ.

The Joining of Hands

The Service of Crowning begins with the invocation of the Holy Trinity. After petitions are offered on behalf of the bride, groom and wedding company, three prayers are read which ascribe to God the institution of marriage and the preservation of His people through the ages. During this prayer the priest joins the right hands of the bride and groom, which symbolizes the union of the couple through the Lord. Since God is the true Celebrant of every sacrament, the priest always expresses himself in the third person. He is simply God's instrument in the service.

The Crowning

The union of the bride and groom is completed with the Crowning. This is an ancient ritual, perhaps reaching back to the 2nd or 3rd century. The priest takes the crowns and, blesses the bride and groom, and then places the crowns upon their heads, chanting, "O Lord our God, crown them with glory and honor." The sponsor exchanges the crowns over the heads of the bride and groom. The service continues with the Epistle (Ephesians 5:20-33) and Gospel (John 2:1-11) readings. The Epistle details the responsibilities of each partner in the marriage and the Gospel recounts Christ's first miracle at the wedding in Cana. There are several interpretations of the significance of the wedding crowns. In ancient times, monarch’s crowns symbolized their absolute rule over their kingdom. Similarly, this liturgical ritual installs the couple over their household as king and queen, with one important difference. Unlike the manipulative, controlling style of rule that many kings and queens personified, this service calls both spouses to rule over their household as Christians who are motivated by Christ-like humility, patience and self sacrificial love. The crowns are also reminders that the married life is one of self-sacrificial love: the couple, like the martyrs die to themselves for the sake of the other.

The Common Cup

Following the readings and brief prayers, the common cup, containing a small portion of wine, is presented to the bride and groom. The priest blesses the cup and offers it to the newly joined husband and wife, representing their equal share in the cup of life. The wine in this cup symbolizes the bitter and sweet moments of married life that both partners will share in together. The drinking of wine from the common cup serves to impress upon the couple that from that moment on they will share everything in life, joys as well as sorrows, and that they are to "bear one another's burdens."  The common cup is not Holy Communion, but the drinking of the one cup of life.  It is also a remembrance of the first miracle at Cana of Galilee.

The Procession

The priest then leads the newly joined husband and wife around the table - a type of religious dance, which was originally the walk the couple took with the priest to their new home, celebrating their union. These steps are the first shared by the newly united couple.  During the procession, a series of hymns are sung. The first speaks of the Isaiah the Prophet's joy when he saw the coming of the Messiah upon the earth. The second recollects the martyrs of the Faith, who received their crowns of glory from God through the sacrifice of their lives. And finally, the third exalts the Holy Trinity.

 The Removal of the Crowns and the Benediction

Upon completion of the procession, the Priest faces the groom and says: "Be magnified, O Bridegroom, as Abraham, and blessed as Isaac, and increased as was Jacob. Go your way in peace, performing in righteousness the commandments of God." After which, the priest turns to the bride and says, "And you, O Bride, be magnified as was Sarah, and rejoiced as was Rebecca, and increased as Rachel, being glad in your husband, keeping the paths of the Law, for so God is well pleased." Then, removing their crowns, the Priest says, "Accept their crowns in Your Kingdom unsoiled and undefiled; and preserve them without offense to the ages of ages." Finally, the priest reads a prayer of benediction and the newly married couple may depart from the Church.

The Wedding Favors

The sugar coated almonds (koufeta), which were placed on the tray with the crowns and which will later be offered to the guests are also symbolic. In the early days of the Church, honey dipped almonds were offered to the newlyweds by the priest. The white symbolizes purity. The egg shape represents fertility and the new life which begins with marriage. The hardness of the almond represents the endurance of marriage and the sweetness of the sugar symbolizes the sweetness of future life. The odd number of almond is indivisible, just as The Bride and The Groom shall remain undivided.